By Jennifer Allwood
First Thoughts
Wow. I just closed the cover to this book. When I bought it, I knew I desperately needed it. I I discovered Jennifer online at the beginning of 2021, taken her challenges, listened to her podcast, and read her posts, and absolutely have been mesmerized by her bold yet not brassy, colorful yet tasteful, honest but uplifting style.
So I knew that in reading this book, I’d be in for a ride, and a good one. With this title, a necessary one! I am a little particular about the integrity of my books (I just love them so), so I very rarely highlight or write in anything but my Bible or a workbook (because it’s designed for it, and yes, I’ve even been known to write everything in a notebook anyway). So you know this book is especially impactful when I actually had to grab my highlighter (which looks like crayon in it, because it’s my special non-bleed-through Bible ones I had nearby) and highlight some of this book right then and there.
Another great sign of an amazing book is when I have multiple bookmarks-one for my current progress, and one for a spot I need to go back to, re-read, and chew on.
So, you might be saying by now, that’s great for you, but what’s in it for me?
What’s Inside?
First of all, this is for you if you are, stuck (chapter 1), overwhelmed (chapter 2), or scared (chapter 3).
This book is all about when we want to do something, we know we need to do it…but we are so stuck and need to get going.
This is a book about taking action and stripping away the excuses that are keeping you stuck.
It’s not just motivational to your feelings. It’s solution and motivation, absolutely, interwoven with truth and grace. It’s oddly kind, and yet brutally helpful.
In my own experience, I have to say, I think you already know if this is a book for you in this season. If it isn’t, add it to your Goodreads or Amazon or whatever wish list you like to use for the day you do feel that way. Or remember it when you’re in a conversation with some friend who is speaking stuck, overwhelmed, or scared language.
She helps you with some hard truths. Like where in your life you’ve been making choices or telling yourself convenient lies that are keeping you stuck. At the end of the book, she recommends going to get help and makes suggestions about it, and if you need it, by all means do so-but I would guess that many of us are stuck in a way that a good book will help. And this is a good, helpful book.
After identifying what your category is, and how you got there, she has a whole section on being ready for change. Are you…really ready? And what would help you decide to become so? She helps you answer these questions for yourself.
In section four, she starts to talk about taking steps now that you’ve identified where you are at and why; now you get real help in moving forward. I would have to call this perhaps the most pivotal part of the whole book, the real entrée of it-although of course, you’ve got to have the first three sections to get there!
The final section, part five, is more than a mere conclusion and restatement; it’s like Jennifer is so all-out to help you that she crams as much as she can in it to keep you going. It’s like she knows you won’t be in this book forever, and she’s got to get you as equipped as possible for success before she sends you off.
She really cares about you, the reader.
So, she doesn’t hold back; she tells her own hard stories; and her own hard lessons. Reading this, if applied to your life, will save you years at least of trying things the long, circuitous route.
So, What Really Stood Out To Me?
I will probably go back and read this. Maybe again and again. But this go-around, here’s some of my favorites:
The first time I just had to whip out my highlighter and personalize my pretty, hard-cover book is on page 16:
“Stuck keeps you way too long in places you aren’t supposed to be.”
Ouch. And yes. You know the good kind of ouch? It’s the sort of ouch when you know you need to hear the truth, it’s good for you, and you’re sorta desperate to get the solution you need. I don’t want to waste any more time simply keeping my own self stuck.
“Since returning to social, I’ve un-followed a bunch of ‘influencers’ and ‘successful people’. And the reason I unfollowed them is not because of anything they were doing wrong, but because of how watching them made me feel.”
She goes on to explain that for her, she didn’t want to get in a tailspin in her own head just because of seeing others and inviting jealousy from what she saw. Wisdom, right?
“When we self-protect, we shield ourselves from the discomfort of doing a hard thing by conquering an easy thing (throwing out old jeans) instead. We feel like we accomplished something without putting ourselves at too much risk.”
Wow. Think about that. Have you done that before? Felt good about a little thing (and sometimes the “small” wins are big wins) but a small win for you, only because you’re avoiding a larger, harder, scarier win? Wow. Let me not be my own distraction.
“You are not weak. You are not a victim. You are not a doormat. And you are not needy. God has given you gifts. He’s given you talents. He’s given you ideas that only you can do. And you have a responsibility to Him and to your family to do those things.”
She goes on to say that you’re to contribute and do your part. And that’s not drop your baby and go get a job. There’s a precious season for babies and such callings in our lives (I can think of caring for an adult relative that can’t care for themselves, for one).
But chances are, if you are reading this far, you’ve got a calling on your life that’s knocking on your door. And your husband, your kids, maybe your grandkids, need you to stand up and be all that you were created to be. Your life counts, it matters, you are being watched more than you know, and it’s time to do the things God placed in your heart.
One of my favorite chapters (besides the above one, and all of them lol), is chapter 15, “How To Be A Yes Girl.” In it, she talks about wanting to be known in heaven as a girl who is quick to say, “yes” to God. And I love that picture. I don’t want to be known here or in eternity as someone who was reluctant, who let fears and vain imaginations and self doubt to keep me back.
When we get up there, friends, there are gonna be a whole lotta people who stood in the same shoes you are standing in right now.
There are mommas in the Renaissance and in the dusty corners of Egyptian times and in Victorian England…who had something to say “yes God” to.
There are people who had difficult marriages, tough grandkids, complicated and distracting lives. They all had to fight through self-doubt, discouragement, fear, and loneliness.
Do you want to be able to sit down with them and just listen…or do you want your own stories to tell? About how God moved in your life…and you let Him? I just know that all the relative pain and trauma, internal and external, will somehow just fade in glory.
And I want to live this life the best I know how, in preparation for the one to come. I don’t know all the answers or how it all works, but I do know enough and have read the Bible enough to be determined to say “yes” anytime I know God is speaking to me.
Post-Read Reactions (or, How Life-Changing IS This Book?)
I don’t think this book will ever be wasted time or space for anyone who commits to reading and taking action on it. If you apply it to yourself, having needed it in the first place, it’ll change your life. I just know it.
It’s best read when you have an ansty feeling that you want to do more, or you know what to do, and you think you’re probably soon maybe really yeah going to do it, but somehow you are still scared. Boom, read this book.
I feel great in a way about this book. By which I mean, it was a little raw and poked my “lazy” places but I want to grow.
Honestly the best analogy I can think of is a really great workout. The kind that you’re heaving after and sweating, but high-fiving everyone and feel like you could do ANYthing right now. That kind of workout.
This book is like that for your soul. It stretches and challenges you, but it makes you better, too. That sweat, to follow the comparison, is the excuses that keep you stuck.
In conclusion, I can’t think of a better way to quickly help you get un-stuck or un-afraid than picking this one up.
My goodness, we waste so.much.time. these days in frivolous (and fun!) games, social media scrolling, and even watching the preview clips on TV streaming services…sacrifice a little of that time for this one. You’ll be SO glad you did!